Parents hope their kids will develop into productive, confident adults. There are very specific strategies that increase the odds of making that hope a reality.
Confident communication
Empower children with critical communication tools they will need from the preschool classroom to the boardroom:
- Effective listening
- Self-advocacy (standing up for themselves)
- Ability to communicate their needs
These are the foundation skills of leadership development and can even prevent your child from being the victim of bullying and abuse. You want your kids to be able to say “No” to other peers or adults who may attempt to harm them. Practice these skills with your child through role play, and show them how to be assertive, ask for what they want, and listen carefully to what others are saying.
Productivity, organization, and self-motivation
This is an area where today’s helicopter parents often struggle to adequately prepare their children for the future. Raising self-starters is hard when you’re in a constant mode to praise, motivate, and reward. For years, parents were encouraged to notice and applaud their kids’ accomplishments and we naturally want our kids to feel good about themselves so we were happy to oblige.
It’s important to let accomplishment be its own motivation and reward. Yes, kids love to be praised, but encouraging their effort and perseverance will serve them more in the long run. When children become people pleasers, they will end up making decisions based on what they think will gain them approval from others instead of being clear about who they are and what they want.
Kids learn to be productive when you trust them to get things done and let them know their contribution helps. Often as parents we know we can do things faster and better than our kids can do them. However, if you hover over your children, continuously criticize, and end up doing it yourself, you don’t encourage mastery, you simply keep reinforcing that they aren’t capable and not good enough. Kids need to do things, imperfectly at first, and keep practicing until they acquire the important skills.
Being organized helps with productivity. Teach your kids basic organizational skills. From letting your little ones clean up their messes and their bedrooms themselves to allowing your teens to organize their schedules and their closets, you’re facilitating their ability to develop skills they will use throughout their lives.
Financial literacy
This final skill is so key for mental health and well-being. Just look at the stress that money issues cause most adults. Here are a few ways to encourage healthy financial literacy skills.
1. Talk about earning, investing, saving, and spending.
Share age-appropriate information about your family’s expenses and income. Give your children a sense of how much time it takes you to earn the money used for various expenses. Give them examples from their own piggy bank or allowance too.
2. Give your children a chance to learn for themselves.
Start teaching your children when they are young with a piggy bank. Show them ways to earn a small allowance by helping out around the house beyond regular chores. Talk with them about how they would like to spend their money, how much they would like to save, and whether they would like to donate any money to charity. With older kids, set up a checking account and a basic budget so they have financial experience long before the fly the nest.
3. Model healthy financial choices.
If you are stressed and fighting over money, you’re setting your children up to do the same someday. Don’t fall into the do as I say, not as I do trap. What you say and what you do will contribute to their beliefs about money. All the subtle and not so subtle comments and actions are absorbed whether you want them to or not. Teach them what you really want them to believe.
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Love this and totally agree, particularly that it is so important to encourage effort and perseverance rather than people-pleasing. Will share this with my connections now 🙂